Monday, July 7, 2008

heartbreak

As the months tick by and the wedding gets closer, many of the planning elements of this wedding are done. Vendors are secured, decisions are made, stuff is ordered and set into place. Basically, the last few months before the wedding come down to execution and second guessing.

I waver a bit on my ability to execute plans but when it comes to second guessing myself I am becoming a stone cold expert.

Even though I have a very particular wedding aesthetic that I'm happily sticking to, I have second guessed pretty much every element of this wedding. Am I sure I want cupcakes? Are these bridesmaid dresses okay? Am I really getting married on Halloween?

These questions are silly, because I love the wedding I'm planning. It feels right to me. Sometimes I just get sidetracked by pretty pictures.

But there is a recent temptation that I just can not get out of my head, that has me questioning my own feelings alternatingly cursing fate for not finding it in time and kicking myself for even considering re-considering.

That is...my dress.

Don't get me wrong...I love my dress. I love it. It gave me all those mystical ooh-ahhhh feelings that they tell you about in the magazines. It makes me feel beautiful and skinny and sexy and the thought that soon I will be able to put it on in a fitting makes my heart beat a little faster. I tried on A LOT of dresses, and that was the only one to make me feel that way.
I. Love. That. Dress.
But sometimes, deep in my heart, I still have a longing for the short dresses.

I often talked about the short dresses, longed for the adorable designer options, and even tried on a few, but none the options available to me either weren't affordable or didn't feel right. I thought it wouldn't be, it couldn't be, and as much as I wanted to be able to see my shoes and sport a bright orange petticoat, I decided to give up the ghost and look at "regular" dresses. Luckily for me I was able to find a long dress that made me feel like a bride.

But then that goddamn Miss Shortcake, who lives to tease torment me with her fashion sense and good ideas, wrote a post today about Dolly Couture.
For the price of a mid-range David's Bridal gown, I could've had a ready to order adorable shortie dress, begging for a birdcage veil and a cute pair of shoes. This one is called the "Hastings on the Hudson" which is lacy perfection, but "Edmonton"....ohhhhhh edmonton......
HOW HARD COULD I HAVE ROCKED THIS DRESS?
It kinda sorta makes me want to cry.

I need to have a fitting for my actual dress soon. I think in the case of clothes, absense is making the heart grow distant, and all these pretty dresses are just a little too much temptation to stand.

2 comments:

oohshiny said...

I think I saw her dress on weddingbee a while ago -- she had a short one, but it was in two pieces, right? I thought of sending you a link to her, but I was pretty sure you paid close attention to that blog.

The dress you have now is a beautiful dress, and you will look fantastic for your wedding!

Miss Shortcake said...

oh, your dress is LOVELY hon!um, no "oohshiny", I'm not wearing a two piece dress - I'm wearing a ball gown ;) I totally commend you on choosing Hallowe'en...that was one of our first choices! :)